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Want to save your relationship this Thanksgiving? Use a pumpkin.

Check my e-mails yesterday, and find one from my handler. It's very bad news. "Write about Thanksgiving." That stark instruction strikes terror deep into what remains of my soul. Writing about something that every other blogger on the planet is going to be writing about in the same week? About something I don't celebrate, have minimal interest in, and that has been totally done to death. The food problems. The family fights. The disasters. Martha Stewart, that other family occasion disaster. Hyped on testosterone and fear, my fingers sprint for Google. I need a fresh angle here ...

Got it!

Everyone concentrates on the preventing the bad parts of Thanksgiving, or celebrating some ridiculously Rockwellesque ideal of how it should be. And they miss the one bit of Thanksgiving that would truly be of benefit to 90% of all relationships. How to turn a day devoted to eating until you can't move into a night of joy and passion in the bedroom.

It turns out to be a remarkably easy recipe. Bake or buy a pumpkin pie and serve it warm with vanilla ice cream. According to the guys at the Smell and Taste Treatment and Research Center, Chicago, at least. They have found, after exhaustive research, that smell of pumpkin is the single strongest smell for boosting a man's readiness for action. Combine it with Lavender, or vanilla for the old and tired guys, and you have a recipe for some serious bedroom action. I really do not want to go into the details of how they measured this, I simply assume that the price of a 'professional' lady in Chicago has risen sharply recently.

And if he, like many weary, overworked and beaten down men, has a wee bit of trouble in the whole prepare for action department, well, feed him the pumpkin seeds, lightly roasted. They are, thanks to their zinc and male hormone content, very potent aphrodisiacs.

But, you say "My parents, the kids, Aunt Gertrude. They will be interfering." No. Just feed them more turkey until they collapse into a tryptophan coma.

So why not make this Thanksgiving something to be truly thankful for. And give respect to the humble pumpkin.

Happy (for once) Holidays.

Alex

There are 131 members of this Group (1 Leader, 129 Member, 1 Webmaster).

25 Reasons Gal Pals Rule

What would I do without my girls?! Probably nothing. For reals, my BFFs don’t just make things possible, they make everything fun! And while I probs haven’t stomped around saying “boys drool!” since I was about six, here’s a list that totally validates the whole grammar school “girls rule” theory, now that we’re all grown up.

  1. When you get dumped, she won’t let you drink alone.
  2. She’ll tell you when you have lipstick on your teeth.
  3. She’ll calm you down when you worry that you’re turning into your mom.
  4. You have someone to IM with all day at work ... and to tell about the guy who’s been IMing you all day at work.
  5. Her mad style will double your wardrobe.
  6. She will enable your chocolate habit (sometimes even with her delicious baked goods).
  7. She’ll wisely talk you out of texting that guy when you’re drunk.
  8. You never have to dance with yourself when you’ve got your girl with you.
  9. She’ll help you strategize to get a guy to hit on you (my BFF pushes me into them accidentallyon purpose).
  10. She’ll bring you soup when you’re sick without judging your bed head
  11. She plays bad cop, so you can play good cop when a new man hits on you.
  12. She’ll totally go with you to the party your crush or ex is at so you can casually run into him.
  13. She’ll do your makeup/hair/nail art real good.
  14. She can tell you honestly how clothes fit you without making you feel like a heffer.
  15. She will karaoke Madonna with you.
  16. She will drop everything to help you find your lost earring/cell phone/mind.
  17. Her advice makes you feel better than a pint of Ben N’ Jerry’s.
  18. She will agree any heartbreaker you call a loser is totes not good enough for you!
  19. Road trips! I call “shot gun.”
  20. She always has an extra tampon handy.
  21. She knows when all the good shoe sales are happening.
  22. She listens to all your man, work, and mama drama like it’s the season finale of “True Blood.”
  23. She saves you when you get cornered at a party by some horny creeper.
  24. She’ll always want to watch “Clueless” again too!
  25. She’ll make you feel better about your abnormal pap.

This article was originally published at Loveawake Blog. Reprinted with permission from the author.

11 Guilty Pleasures We All Do In Our Lives

We all have fantasies of something that we avoid in our life. Whether it is having a scoop of ice cream when you have a sore throat, eating a chocolate bar when you are on a diet or stealing complimentary items from a hotel room, we all do things that leave us with a feeling of remorse.

Here we are going to list some of the best guilty pleasures we all love doing once in a blue moon:

1.     Procrastination In Office

Procrastination is common in the workplace. We all take a bit liberty as workers. Some bask in taking extra break time. Some enjoy the nap in the office, while some likes to indulge in checking their social media profiles. All these things are common forms of procrastination in the workplace.

2.     Checking Messages Of Your Partner

Everyone who is in a relationship takes pleasure in reading messages his partner. But the guilt of the act keeps them from involving in such things. Nonetheless, many of us secretly check the messages of our partner whenever we get a chance even if results in a feeling of guilt.

3.     Eating Chocolates During A Diet Plan

That’s the fantasy of many women who are crazy about getting a size-zero physique. Many women take the liberty of having a chocolate or two during fitness diet plan even though it makes them feel guilty about it. But for them, it is okay as a few extra calories will not do any harm to their petite physique.

4.     Skipping The College Homework

The idea of writing an academic paper without taking assistance of assignment help UK is enough to make students feel bored. This is why many students skip their papers which only make them feel embarrassed in front of their teachers.

5.     Stealing Items From A Hotel

We all know that it is an immoral thing and yet we do it. The temptation to steal complimentary items from hotels is not easy to resist. This is why many of us involve in such activities only to feel guilty later.

6.     Stalking Social Media Profiles Of Your Ex

It is difficult to move ahead after a breakup. The curiosity to know the love life of your ex keeps you in a constant pursuit of his activities and what can be an easier way to do it than checking his social media profiles. A lot of people resort to checking the social media profiles of their ex in order to find out about his life and what he is at.

7.     Skipping The Workouts

The very thought of hitting the gym can be frustrating enough to make you think twice. Usually, it is the weekend when we lack the energy to go to the gym. No wonder many of us skip workouts during the Saturdays and Sundays.

8.     Flirting While You Are In A Relationship

Sometimes, we get so tempted by the idea of flirting that we forget that we are committed in a relationship. Few of us get so besotted by the charisma of someone that they feel compelled to make a flirtatious attempt without realizing that they are already in a relationship.

9.     Spying On Your Boyfriend

Girls don’t always trust their men. The urge to know the whereabouts of their men force many women to check on the activities of their men. Although, it only makes them feel guilty later.

10.                       Sleeping Some Extra Hours

We all love our sleep time. Sometimes, it is difficult for us to leave the bed because we are either too tired or too greedy top get out of bed. This behavior is often seen during the weekend when we hit the hay after a long party and we have to force ourselves out of bed in the afternoon.

11.                       Badmouthing A Coworker

Some of us can’t tolerate the progress of our coworkers. We get jealous when they get an award or get promoted to a higher position. To vent out their frustration, they badmouth their coworkers and say nasty things in their absence.

We all have our share of guilty pleasures that we do in our daily lives. The aforementioned are some of the many guilty pleasures we do without thinking.

 

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